Who does not have a bias of some sort?  When we look at ourselves, we believe that we are right, did our best, and likely have applied all the principles we wish others would adopt and act on. While these consternations with others may warrant us looking at ourselves first, therein lies the problem.

The words “I am not the problem” says it all.  We say we are going to do something and do it for a day or two, or possibly over the year once a month, but we do not embody the principles. In discussion, we pay lip service to the changes and say all the right things, so much so that others may initially seem impressed. For example, the person who says they are committed to the new meeting or supervision practices the organization is implementing. Yet, all their actions show little openness to support any change.

Remove the mask. We need to show who we are, and if we are at fault, we should look to methodically and conscientiously work at change, and where we know we struggle, likely due to years of our social indoctrination, it is best to own it. We can see a little better when we remove the mask, allowing others to recognize what they already knew existed behind it.  People are more tolerant of others’ flaws when they admit their flaws and are more willing to help and show empathy if the person reveals themselves for who they are. It may not be pretty at first, but it is genuine, and therein is beauty itself.

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