You work in the same organization. You both love the same movie genre. You are from the same town, city, county. You play the same sports, like the same drinks, and support the exact cause. So there is a multitude of ways we can connect with a person.

When we do, we feel we have a kindred spirit. We connect and create a bond. Fostering that connection is invaluable. 

And there, we should stop emphasizing the likeness, or at least tread lightly and move slowly. The fact you have found something you both agree on does not suggest you align in all respects. When you do discover the differences, and you will, do not resort to the apparent fallback: judgment. Since you had a bond, when you recognize the differences, you may even feel betrayed.

Would we not be better served to appreciate what we have in common and build on that, rather than highlighting what is now clearly out of sync? Possibly we can best appreciate we are different, which can lead to a more colorful relationship, and more so, that common interest is still prevalent. 

Ultimately, we will never be aligned with anyone completely, and if we think we are, we may not be asking the right questions or listening that well. Humans are far too complex to be the same. So relish the diversity, and celebrate the commonality, and learn from our differences.  After all, do you only want to spend time with someone in your likeness each and every day?

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