We ask for authenticity like it’s free.
Show up as yourself, we say. Be real. Bring your whole self to the table.
Then someone does it. They disagree in the meeting. They admit the plan is broken. They say the thing everyone was thinking.
Suddenly authenticity is inconvenient.
Here’s the trick nobody names: authenticity is a demand we make of others and a luxury we ration for ourselves.
The leader wants the manager who tells the truth. But does the leader tell the truth about the runway, the culture, the real reason someone got fired?
The manager wants direct feedback from the team. Watch how fast that manager gets defensive when the feedback arrives.
Authenticity isn’t a policy you announce. It’s a standard you set with your own exposure first.
The team doesn’t calibrate to what you say you want. They calibrate to what you’re willing to risk.
If you want honesty in the room, go first. Say the uncomfortable thing before you ask anyone else to.
Standards don’t trickle up. They trickle down, from whoever has the least to lose.
So before demanding authenticity, ask a smaller question.
What have you shown today that you couldn’t take back?
