In most interactions, we often find ourselves entangled in the threads of others’ problems. It’s a curious phenomenon – how someone else’s grievance can suddenly become our burden, and soon enough, we are snared.
The ancient philosopher Epictetus wisely noted, “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”
We inadvertently take on their emotional baggage when we engage with someone’s negative attitude or grievance. But do we not have enough of our daily struggles?
Here are some strategies to maintain balance:
- Practice mindful detachment: Acknowledge others’ feelings without absorbing them.
- Set clear boundaries: Learn to say no when necessary. \
- Use the “Not my circus, not my monkeys” approach: Recognize when a problem isn’t yours to solve.
- Implement the ‘Grey Rock’ method: Become uninteresting to toxic individuals by responding neutrally.
As the Dalai Lama suggests, “If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.”
This does not suggest becoming callous or indifferent. Instead, we can maintain healthy boundaries and preserve our mental energy for the battles that truly matter.
Choose wisely which burdens to carry. If your burdens are those of others, your life is good or you may need to start living your own life more. After all, theirs is already taken, and it is rather sticky.
