You know of individuals who are people pleasers. You may even be one. The individual is always there to assist or even bail out the ‘cooler’ or authoritative figure. Like Mike McDermott (played by Matt Damon in Rounder’s), where life will always present the Worm in some form, the people pleaser fills a role.
Yet, it is often the people’s pleasers who consistently disappoint one person – themselves. When we are too preoccupied with satisfying others, we fulfill no one, especially ourselves. So, why is it that we consistently disappoint ourselves? And we do. Yet, for others, we go the extra distance to satisfy.
While pleasing and caring for others is a virtue to be admired, can we care for others when we are not cared for? How does your saddened heart recover because you please someone else? Who benefits when you prevail with a job with little enrichment or potential? Yet, you have justified it to date. Then there is new work, and you take on the additional load when your plate is full. You cannot say no, so you say yes. Yet why? Because no one else can take on the work, or is this a noble virtue that you sustain.
Instead of being the people pleaser, check to see if the main person – you- has been taken care of. Put your life jacket on before helping others since you will be of little use to them if you drown first.
